Topic: Every generation of people is different in important ways. How is your generations different from your parent’s generation? (please evaluate my essay)

QuestionsCategory: Writing Task 2Topic: Every generation of people is different in important ways. How is your generations different from your parent’s generation? (please evaluate my essay)
livermore asked 6 months ago

Topic:  Every generation of people is different in important ways. How is your generations different from your parent’s generation?
It is irrefutable fact that when generations changing occurs in each society, we have chance to show gaps between past and present  generations. Admittedly, it is interesting to compare their differences and thoughts. From my prospective, current adolescents are different from their parent’s generation in education and social interaction.
Initially, there are considerable differences in the manners of their studies. To illustrate, today’s teenagers are focusing on technological subjects, in particular, virtual game animation and IT. Main reason is contemporary technology that is completely link with their study, therefore they do not pay great attention to learning other subjects and neglect them. In comparison to earlier times when technological devices did not exist, their parent’s generations strongly collaborated with books which compel them to deeply study and helped them  to accumulate pivotal knowledge. Thus, they excelled in each spheres of education, such as biology, math, literature  and so on. Fortunately, our parents grew up in non-technological condition, otherwise they may squander their valuable time to vain efforts as current young individuals.
Social interaction is second hot spot which leads to bulk of arguable controversies in our society. Undoubtedly, after communication gadgets were invented, reputation of human beings declined considerably because nobody make effort  to meet each other face to face now. In other words, impact of communication devices is being decimated relationships of people. For instance, juveniles nowadays prefer to keep in touch  via various ways such as internet, telephone and video chat that facilitate  their connections. Hence, they do not meet each other or rarely gather on special occasions whereas their parent’s generation retained  respect among themselves. Namely, they always did mental exercises together and at the same time they competed on the several subjects, as a result they shared beneficial knowledge with each other. Therefore nothing encumbered their enviable relationship.
To sum up, in my personal point of view, dissimilarity of generations signifies development of mankind.   

Topic: Every generation of people is different in important ways. How is your generations different from your parent’s generation? (please evaluate my essay)
5 (100%) 1 vote

livermore replied 6 months ago

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livermore replied 6 months ago

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livermore replied 6 months ago

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3 Answers
plin0627 answered 6 months ago

It is irrefutable fact that when generations changing generation gaps occurs in each society, we have chance to show gaps between past and present generations. Admittedly, it is interesting to compare their differences and thoughts. From my prospective, current adolescents are different from their parent’s generations in terms of education and social interaction.
(Your background statement is confusing and need paraphrasing. It sounds like sentences that are separated from each other. Do not use ‘we’ in formal writing, except when you are giving your own opinion, you can use phrases like “from my perspective/in my opinion”)
It is irrefutable fact that generation gaps occur in each society and it is always interesting to compare the differences and thoughts between the past and present generations. From my perspective, today’s adolescents are different from their parents’ generation in terms of education practice and social interaction.

Initially, there are considerable differences in the manners  (can you think of other word? Eg: practice/patterns) of their studies. To illustrate, today’s teenagers are focusing on technological subjects, in particular, virtual game animation and IT. Main reason is contemporary technology that is completely link with their study (what does this mean?), therefore they do not pay great attention to learning other subjects and neglect them.
Main Idea 1: Initially, there are considerable differences in the learning practice.
How? Many teenagers are focusing on technological subjects, in particular, virtual game animation and information technology, whereby they lose interest in areas such as arts and science which are traditionally taught in classes.
Outcome? This situation has cause students who eventually do not emphasize on other subjects learning which are equally important to their development.
In comparison to the earlier times when technological devices did not exist, their parent’s parents’ only learning medium was strongly collaborated with books which compel them to deeply study acquire learning in-depth and helped them to accumulate pivotal knowledge. Thus, they excelled in each spheres of education, such as biology, math, literature and so on. Fortunately, our parents grew up in a non-technological condition environment, otherwise they may squander their valuable time to vain efforts as current young individuals. (This sentence did not connect to earlier sentences, you may need to explain for it.)

Social interaction is second hot spot (hot spot is not relevant! Use “factor/aspect/reason” instead ) which leads to bulk of arguable controversies in our society. (unnecessary phrases) that depicts the differences between both groups. Undoubtedly, after since communication gadgets were invented, reputation (are you saying ‘relationship’?) of human beings declined are weakening considerably because nobody less people would make effort to meet each other face to face now. In other words, impact of communication devices is are being decimated relationships of people. For instance, juveniles nowadays prefer to keep in touch  via various ways such as internet, telephone and video chat.  that facilitate  their connections. Hence,  They do not meet each other or rarely, gather only on special occasions whereas their parents generation retained  respect among themselves. Namely, they always did mental exercises together and at the same time they competed on the several subjects, as a result, they shared beneficial knowledge with each other. Therefore and nothing encumbered their enviable relationship.

To sum up, in my personal point of view, dissimilarity of generations signifies development of mankind.   (You did not summarised your main points)
My comment is make your essay straight forward for easy understanding. 

Topic: Every generation of people is different in important ways. How is your generations different from your parent’s generation? (please evaluate my essay)
5 (100%) 1 vote

livermore replied 6 months ago

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livermore replied 6 months ago

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livermore replied 6 months ago

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livermore answered 6 months ago

thanks for feedback!!!

Topic: Every generation of people is different in important ways. How is your generations different from your parent’s generation? (please evaluate my essay)
5 (100%) 1 vote

livermore replied 6 months ago

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livermore replied 6 months ago

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livermore replied 6 months ago

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livermore answered 6 months ago

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Topic: Every generation of people is different in important ways. How is your generations different from your parent’s generation? (please evaluate my essay)
5 (100%) 1 vote

livermore replied 6 months ago

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livermore replied 6 months ago

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livermore replied 6 months ago

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