my IELTS is exam on 4th march … please check my answer, and give me feedback. Thank you in advance ;)

QuestionsCategory: Problem-Solutionmy IELTS is exam on 4th march … please check my answer, and give me feedback. Thank you in advance ;)
Gaziz Zhumabekov asked 3 years ago

 TOPIC: Nowadays it is more difficult for children to concentrate or pay attention in school. What could be the possible reasons for this? Which are the solutions you can propose?
 
It is well-known belief that children have been experiencing a huge load regarding their educational process for the last 20 years. This essay will attempt to examine the prime factors of their concentration loss accompanied with several solutions put forward in order to mitigate and surmount the long standing problem mentioned and come up with a comprehensive conclusion.
To begin with, the key reason for the low interest and decreasing attention to the studying process is the distracting factor of gadgets, namely smartphones and computers, due to which students may waste their time previously planned to be expended on doing homework or assignment. Moreover, most of such games or apps make children addicted that, in turn, can possibly impair their health and deteriorate their examination scores as well. Another factor worth mentioning for decreasing students’ eagerness to study is a heavy load, owing to the fact that students spend more time at school and they have insufficient time for completing their homework thus paying less attention to studies.
There are several solutions that may potentially overcome the aforementioned issue. One suggestion could be maintaining balance between education and leisure time to reduce study load and, in turn, raise the concentration of youngsters. That is to say schools should take reforms apropos of lowering the time for studying in order to preserve and increase the interest for learning. Moreover, teachers may prohibit the use of cellphones during lessons as well as making school time more entertaining and captivating by means of acquiring new qualifications and inventing revolutionary methods on educating students.
All aspects considered, the compelling factors for attention loss in education are gadgets and non-uniform distribution of load, but they can be tackled by dint of contemporary teaching methods and proper time allocation.

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