I wrote this essay by following your suggestions. Could you please check? Thank you.

QuestionsCategory: DicussionI wrote this essay by following your suggestions. Could you please check? Thank you.
ieltstaker asked 10 months ago

Discipline is an ever increasing problem in modern schools. Some people think that discipline should be the responsibility of teachers, while others think that this is the role of parents.
Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
 İt is true that fusty methods do not work any longer on training children, such as shouting at them or creating a glommy atmosphere in classroom. To a certain extent, I believe that it is the assignment of parents however I do not think that teachers have a peripheral role on this either.
  As children spend the majortiy part of their day at school, the biggest part of this duty should be fullfilled by the teachers which have an important impact on kids. İt is commonly believed that at early ages, children tend to be effected by their teacher in a positive way, so thus, under a meticulous scrunity of teacher, they can be easily controlled, however, it would be impossible to discipline them without any attempt except teachers. There is a need of co-operation. For example, teachers can amass the parents to conduct a regular meeting and should inform them about their children behaviours so therefore, with the help of information swap between them, I believe, a remarkable decrease could be seen in defying the rules among the children.
 On the other hand, the fact that teachers undertake the majority part of this co-operation does not render parents useless as being involved by this co-operation is inevitable for them as well. They should follow the instructions of the teachers and should regulate their private life according to their suggestions if they really want to suppress the indiscipline of their kids. For example some measures can be introduced among the members of family such as creating an dinner time which is mandatory to adapt should be enacted in its exact meaning to make children familiar with rules. İn addition to this, a sleeping time should be regularly chased, a reading time or watching television. Shortly, children who come back from school which is governed by some rules, should not disenthrall themselves from the school’s rules that they are familiar with. The same atmosphere should be maintained at home as well.
İn conclusion, I believe that the best way to train children is to create a co-operation between families and teachers. Having said that, as I underscored above, I think teachers have more responsibility to provide discipline.

I wrote this essay by following your suggestions. Could you please check? Thank you.
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