Hello! Could you please assess my essay? Thanks in advance. Question " it is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? what sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children?

QuestionsCategory: Writing Task 2Hello! Could you please assess my essay? Thanks in advance. Question " it is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? what sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children?
az asked 10 months ago

Learning good behavior in young age is easy, because a child’s brain is more active and it can learn faster than an adult. Sometimes, when a kid does not fathom the concept of good and bad, chastisement becomes unavoidable and in my opinion, it is the right thing to do. However, there are types of penalties which includes physical torture, and psychological torture, and they are totally a big “no” to do. Role of punishment is ought to make a child better but aforementioned sentences can make a child worse.
Parents and teachers both are accountable for the brought up of a good, well-behaved child. These days, abusive words or sentences catches attention of almost every school-going kid. For example; if a child utters any bad word or sentence about anyone, our responsibility here is to let him know that it is highly inappropriate and make him say ten to fifteen sentences about good qualities of that person or you can encourage him to buy gifts for the person he has abused. This practice will effect him positively and will cause him to stop bad mouthing, which will eventually create a good psychological impact on him.
Rewarding your child on good habits is also very advantageous in cultivating good behaviors in children. Buying him presents or surprising him with his favorite meal can have long-term healthy impression on his brain. As we all know kids usually imitate their parents or teachers, hence, when they see their role models doing these acts, they will also continue to do so, which will make them even more genial, and humble person.
In the end, I would like to mention a quote, “It is easy to bring up a gentleman than to mend a broken adult”. Indoctrination of distinguishing good and bad habits in your child is vital. Punishing them is inevitable at times, but it should be kept in mind that these penalties ought to be constructive and not destructive for them.
 

Hello! Could you please assess my essay? Thanks in advance. Question " it is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? what sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children?
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1 Answers
Thuy Dung Pham answered 9 months ago

Learning good behavior in-> at a young age is easy, because a child’s brain is more active and it can learn faster than an adult. Sometimes, when a kid does not fathom the concept of good and bad, chastisement becomes unavoidable and in In my opinion, it is the right thing to do. However, there are types of penalties which includes physical torture, and psychological torture, and they are totally a big “no” to do. Role of punishment is ought to make a child better but aforementioned sentences can make a child worse.
Parents and teachers both are accountable for the brought up of a good, well-behaved child. These days, abusive words or sentences catches attention of almost every school-going kid. For example; if a child utters any bad word or sentence about anyone, our responsibility here is to let him know that it is highly inappropriate and make him say ten to fifteen sentences about good qualities of that person or you can encourage him to buy gifts for the person he has abused. This practice will effect him positively and will cause him to stop bad mouthing, which will eventually create a good psychological impact on him.
Rewarding your child on good habits is also very advantageous in cultivating good behaviors in children. Buying him presents or surprising him with his favorite meal can have long-term healthy impression on his brain. As we all know kids usually imitate their parents or teachers, hence, when they see their role models doing these acts, they will also continue to do so, which will make them even more genial, and humble person.
In the end, I would like to mention a quote, “It is easy to bring up a gentleman than to mend a broken adult”. Indoctrination of distinguishing good and bad habits in your child is vital. Punishing them is inevitable at times, but it should be kept in mind that these penalties ought to be constructive and not destructive for them.
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Task achievement: 6.0 (addresses all parts of the task, presents an overview with information appropriately selected)
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0 (arranges information and ideas coherently and there is a clear overall progression)
Lexical Resource: 5.5 (uses only basic and limited range of vocabulary)
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5.5 (uses a mix of simple and complex sentences but only a limited range of structures)
Overall: 5.5 (Overall, you understand the instruction but this task needs to be improved.)

Hello! Could you please assess my essay? Thanks in advance. Question " it is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? what sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children?
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