Global warming. Can you please evaluate my essay and give you opinion?

QuestionsCategory: Problem-SolutionGlobal warming. Can you please evaluate my essay and give you opinion?
Anastasia asked 4 years ago

Global warming is one of the most serious issues that the world is facing today. What are the causes of global warming and what measures can governments and individuals take to tackle the issue?
One of the greatest threats which our planet is facing at the present time is the global warming. This issue is commonly discussed at different conferences and people on different levels from all over the world are involved in handling this problem.
A lot of researches show that the most destructive factor is emissions of CO2 which breaks down the ozone layer responsible for protection from UV rays. All over the world there are huge numbers of productions which annually release megatons of CO2. The second most important factor is deforestation. Trees are extremely vulnerable formations which produce oxygen in exchange for CO2. Rates of timber logging are rising extremely, however factories are not in a hurry to plant new trees. Additionally, the gradually increasing number of cars also has a negative impact. Moreover, a lot of people use cars in irrationally, for example, they don’t shut off the engine at traffic lights or in traffic jams. Also, they tend to use big cars, which consume a lot of gas. In my opinion, all these factors may indirectly cause global warming.
In terms of solutions, I think both the governments and each particular individual should be responsible for prevention of the global warming. The factories should be forced to reduce emissions of CO2 and obliged to install air purification systems to protect the environment from excessive CO2. Besides, it would help if big companies were obliged to plant new trees. People can also help by planting trees. In addition, there must be a centralized recycling system to help factories process their waste that will result in reduced CO2 emissions. Also people should use public transportation or car sharing pools to reduce air pollution caused by cars.
It can be seen, that the progress is having a great impact on the global climate. However, there are certain steps to prevent this and save the environment from changing. Handling this problem by a joint effort of the government and individuals will prevent the climate change.

Rachel replied 4 years ago

should not use contraction in academic writing

Anastasia replied 4 years ago

Thanks a lot.

1 Answers
Rachel Evans answered 4 years ago

Global warming is one of the most serious issues that the world is facing today. What are the causes of global warming and what measures can governments and individuals take to tackle the issue?
One of the greatest threats which our planet is facing at the present time is the global warming. This issue is commonly discussed at different conferences, and people on different levels from all over the world are involved in handling this problem.
A lot of researches show that the most destructive factor is emissions of CO2 which breaks down the ozone layer responsible for protection from UV rays. All over the world there are huge numbers of productions which annually release megatons of CO2. The second most important factor is deforestation. Trees are extremely vulnerable formations which produce oxygen in exchange for CO2. Rates of timber logging are rising extremely, however factories are not in a hurry to plant new trees. Additionally, the gradually increasing number of cars also has a negative impact. Moreover, a lot of people use cars in irrationally, for example, they don’t do not shut off the engine at traffic lights or in traffic jams. Also, they tend to use big cars, which consume a lot of gas. In my opinion, all these factors may indirectly cause global warming.
In terms of solutions, I think both the governments and each particular individual should be responsible for prevention of the global warming. The factories should be forced to reduce emissions of CO2 and obliged to install air purification systems to protect the environment from excessive CO2. Besides, it would help if big companies were obliged to plant new trees. People can also help by planting trees. In addition, there must be a centralized recycling system to help factories process their waste that will result in reduced CO2 emissions. Also people should use public transportation or car sharing pools to reduce air pollution caused by cars.
It can be seen, that the progress is having a great impact on the global climate. However, there are certain steps to prevent this and save the environment from changing. Handling this problem by a joint effort of the government and individuals will prevent the climate change.
TA – 6.5

  • Address all tasks
  • Present relevant ideas

CC – 6.0

  • there’s a clear overall progression
  • confusing at places

LR – 6.5

  • Use an adequate range of vocabulary of the task
  • Overuse of unnecessary article

GRA – 6.0

  • Use limited range of structures
  • faulty in punctuation that cause confusion for readers

Overall 6.0

Rachel replied 4 years ago

should not use contraction in academic writing

Anastasia replied 4 years ago

Thanks a lot.

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