Could you please check my essay and give some feedback and score? thanks in advance :)

QuestionsCategory: OpinionCould you please check my essay and give some feedback and score? thanks in advance :)
livermore asked 2 years ago

Do you think that it is right for rich countries to pollute the environment?
 
The environmental  crisis has emerged on alarming level due to current industrial revolution which is being decimated our green planet. Admittedly, green house impact, global warming, ozone layer depletion and drought are common terms that everybody hears on daily basis. Yet humanity do not comprehend consequence of above issues that entail countless national calamity and major health problem.
Undoubtedly, affluent countries such as China being prospered with own enviable industry since they being obtained excellent result in each sphere of industry. Despite the fact China still remains on first place on list of global pollutants result in their manufacturing enterprises. In other words, factories produce various goods and at the same time it emits vast of detrimental fumes to air. To illustrate, these days several parts of China covered with smog as a result inhabitants had faced up challenges to breathe in undesirable weather condition. Thus, people had to bay masks and oxygen to survive in unpleasant climate. Another hot spot in this situation is Japan where nuclear station being ruined whole nature in recent times. For instance, Fukusimo is one of the problematic areas since radioactive rays being wiped out annual harvest. In addition to this, above mentioned harmful rays had altered numerous genes of infants in consequence babies born with awfully defects.
Further and even more importantly, most of wealthy countries transfer their various forms factories to other rural zones cause it enables to industrialize more available areas and boost their industrial possibilities. Subsequently, they carry on to develop while it brings on environmental degradation in outcome rich consume whereas poor suffer the pollution.
By way of conclusion, it is not right for affluent countries to pollute environment in order to reach industrial growth. Actually mankind duty to preserve nature.
(298)
 

Could you please check my essay and give some feedback and score? thanks in advance 🙂
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livermore replied 2 years ago

kindly assess my essay.

livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

please check my essay! thanks beforehand…

livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

Please check it.

livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

please check my essay!

livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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1 Answers
Rachel Evans answered 2 years ago

Do you think that it is right for rich countries to pollute the environment?
 
The environmental crisis has emerged on alarming level due to current industrial revolution which is being decimated our green planet. Admittedly, green house impact, global warming, ozone layer depletion and drought are common terms that everybody hears on daily basis. Yet humanity does not comprehend consequence of above issues that entail countless national calamity and major health problem.
Undoubtedly, affluent countries such as China being prospered with own enviable industry since they being obtained excellent result in each sphere of industry. Despite the fact China still remains on first place on list of global pollutants polluters result in their manufacturing enterprises. In other words, factories produce various goods and at the same time it emits they emit vast of detrimental fumes to air. To illustrate, these days several parts of China are covered with smog as a result inhabitants had faced up challenges to breathe in undesirable weather condition. Thus, people had to bay (?) masks and oxygen to survive in unpleasant climate. Another hot spot in this situation is Japan, where nuclear station being ruined whole nature in recent times. For instance, Fukusimo is one of the problematic areas since radioactive rays being wiped out annual harvest. In addition to this, above mentioned harmful rays had altered numerous genes of infants, in consequence babies born with awfully defects.
Further and even more importantly, most of wealthy countries transfer their various forms factories to other rural zones because it enables to industrialize more available areas and boost their industrial possibilities. Subsequently, they carry on to develop developing while it brings on environmental degradation in outcome rich consume whereas poor suffer the pollution.
By way of conclusion, it is not right for affluent countries to pollute environment in order to reach industrial growth. Actually mankind duty to preserve nature. (?)
TA – 6.5

  • Address parts of the task but not really well-developed

CC – 7.0
LR – 6.5

  • errors in word choice

GRA – 6.5
Overall 6.5
 
 

Could you please check my essay and give some feedback and score? thanks in advance 🙂
Rate this post

livermore replied 2 years ago

kindly assess my essay.

livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

please check my essay! thanks beforehand…

livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

Please check it.

livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

please check my essay!

livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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livermore replied 2 years ago

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