Could you please check my essay and assess? I really do not have any idea about at which band I am.

QuestionsCategory: OpinionCould you please check my essay and assess? I really do not have any idea about at which band I am.
ieltstaker asked 2 years ago

Some children recieve almost no encouragement from their parents regarding their perfonmance at school. While other children recieve too much pressure from their over enthusiastic parents which can have a negative impact on the child.
 
Why do you think some parents put too much pressure on their children to perfrom well at school?
 
What do you think the role of parent should be in their child’s education?
 
 İt is a common problem among the societies to oppress children to have good results on their studies. İn some situations, it is recorded that children who were grown under a strict scrutiny had more bad results in their education life than others who were grown relatively  with more freedom.
 
 İt is generally believed that to exercise control over kids could provide the results which were wished. This method nowadays is still valid and applied by the majority part of parents. İn fact, it is oftenly ignored the fact that parents who put pressure on their kids to perfrom well have some psychological reasons for this. For instance, applying pressure on kids is generally observed in the parents who could not succeed to have a good education in their own life which cause them to feel a relatively undue fear to have grown up a child who could not graduated with a decent degree. İn addition to this, bringing up a child who is successful at his school and other fields is perceived as a sign of status among the societies which therefore enable parents to naturally protect their statues by applying pressure on their children.
 
On the other hand, I believe parents should be supportive and should embolden their children to perfom in a good way in their education life. Because in my opinion, being disenthralled from pressure makes children to believe that, it is not the end of the world even in case of failure which foster them to study tranquilly without any anxiety which is believed to be major effect to prevent to be successful. Additionally, parents should not impose their dreams which they could not make real. Because orientating children to choose an unsuitable field for them also can cause to fail so thus parents should leave the ultimate decision to their child and should adapt this decision as he/she does.
 
To sum up,  in each situation parents should be with their kids I believe, which propel them on their education life. Having said that I also believe as I emphasized above, the reason that make parents to put pressure on their children is simply a fear.

Could you please check my essay and assess? I really do not have any idea about at which band I am.
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