I'm in deep difficulty. Can you please check and score my essay? Thanks in advance.

QuestionsCategory: Advantage/DisadvantageI'm in deep difficulty. Can you please check and score my essay? Thanks in advance.
dosgortol asked 1 month ago

 
Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Globalization and nation-based states have rendered many local languages useless, as their users were compelled to use their region’s dominant languages. While some people think that it would tear down the language-induced barriers between nations, which make international interactions more difficult, however, I do believe that all languages are vitally important.
 
First of all, it is known that languages have an illuminating effect on people’s life. Old traditions, beliefs and other social methods were embeded in languages, which could give us worthy information. For example, maya civilization which once lived in America is believed to be highly developed than their peers, which thus makes their language extremely important. However, nowadays their language is not used and is not sufficently scrutinized, which I believe, has an eye-opening information about universe, as well as their life style that could contribute to America’s history.
 
Secondly, it is perfectly accepted that a language is the conscience of one’s culture. People therefore could not grasp as much about a field, such as physics or literature as they can in their native language, which as a result, enables the countries that have widely-used languages to have a monopoly over the most important fields, such as science or art. Last and foremost, I believe, is the ethical aspect of the deprivation from mother languages. As languages have all the secrets, keys and historical developments of one’s culture, allowing a language to die out seems to me like to eradicate a nation. İn Anatolia for example, where civilization was launched, many nations have vanished with their languages and their descendenses therefore do not have any information about their civilization which once ruled many people and contributed to the development of the human race.
 
İn conclusion, I believe that each language has vitally important beliefs, traditions and historical knowledge that human beign can utilize from.

I'm in deep difficulty. Can you please check and score my essay? Thanks in advance.
5 (100%) 1 vote

1 Answers
Thuy Dung Pham answered 1 month ago

Globalization and nation-based states have rendered many local languages useless, as their users were compelled to use their region’s dominant languages. While some people think that it would tear down the language-induced barriers between nations, which make international interactions more difficult, . (Full stop) however However, I do believe that all languages are vitally important.
 
First of all, it is known that languages have an illuminating effect on people’s life. Old traditions, beliefs and other social methods were embeded in languages, which could give us worthy information. For example, maya civilization which once lived in America is believed to be highly developed than their peers, which thus eventually makes their language extremely important. However, nowadays their language is not used and is not sufficently scrutinized, which I believe, has an eye-opening information about universe, as well as their life style that could contribute to America’s history.
 
Secondly, it is perfectly accepted that a language is the conscience of one’s culture. People therefore could not grasp as much about a field, such as physics or literature as they can in their native language, which as a result, enables the countries that have widely-used languages to have a monopoly over the most important fields, such as science or art. Last and foremost, I believe, is the ethical aspect of the deprivation from mother languages. As languages have all the secrets, keys and historical developments of one’s culture, allowing a language to die out seems to me like to eradicate a nation. İn Anatolia, (comma) for example, where civilization was launched, many nations have vanished with their languages and their descendenses therefore do not have any information about their civilization which once ruled many people and contributed to the development of the human race.
 
İn conclusion, I believe that each language has vitally important beliefs, traditions and historical knowledge that human beign can utilize from.
Task achievement: 7.0 (addresses all parts of the task, presents, extends and supports main ideas)
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5 (logically organises information and ideas and there is a clear overall progression)
Lexical Resource: 6.5 (uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision, manage to use less common lexical items but there are still some minor errors)
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7.0 (uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but may make a few errors like punctuation and run-on sentences)
Overall: 6.5 (good organisation and good ideas)


 

I'm in deep difficulty. Can you please check and score my essay? Thanks in advance.
5 (100%) 1 vote